Friday 7 February 2014

Smartness:

Adam[man] and Eve[woman] were the first human beings in the world
one fine day eve asked Adam' do you love me'
Adam said 'do i have another choice'

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To avoid getting entangles with child-labor laws, I have decided to appoint a child as a CEO.


Special ego massage, please!

You are right.. Minimalism did not make any sense to me until I began to bald!

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The kidnapers of your son sir! He says you've grossly undervalued your company to fix the random amount!

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Ask.. whatever you want, but don't ask me to walk my talk.

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Dad – Dear, I want you to marry a girl of my choice.
Son – no way..
Dad - She is the daughter of world's richest man.
Son – then its done.
Then his dad goes to that richest man..
Dad - I want your daughter to marry my son.
Rich man – nope
Dad: He is the COO of world bank.
Rich man – then its done.
Then Dad again goes to president of bank.
He asked – appoint my son the COO of the world bank.
Him – Never
Dad: – He is the son in law of World's richest man.
Him – then its fine.

THIS IS Smartness...!!

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The only thing our students want to hear from you, sir, is how to engineer jobs in the current market!

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Boss:

The virus means business. It wants us to send online secure payment to leave our system.

I chose a wrong mentor - what about you?

The golden rule of work is that the bosses jokes are ALWAYS funny.

Interpretation: It is true when your boss shares something witty, you must laugh otherwise he might feel insulted and your promotion can be stopped. So whether they are funny or not, everyone laughs at them.

Employee : Boss, you called me?
Boss : Yes, go to home and make love with your wife.
Employee : (After an hour) ,done sir
Boss : Do it again.
Employee : Done again, sir.
Boss : Do it once more
Employee : Now I don't have
stamina for it, sir.
Boss : Very good,here are my car
keys, drop my daughter at home.


Explanation: What a smart and proactive boss. He is so doubtful about his employee or daughter that he makes his worker to tried before sending his daughter with him. But anyhow it was a funny experience. Isn't it?

A pregnant lady asked her Sir if she could have the day off because she wasn't feeling fine. He tells her the only way she is leaving work is if she starts her contractions. So she yells "shouldn't, couldn't, Can't, didn't, won't, wouldn't!"

Driver:

Are you afraid of dying alone? Become a bus driver.

Interpretation: How witty! This joke tells that we all need company to something daring. They are not suggesting how to avoid suicide but giving you idea to be bus driver because there are hundreds more people who can go heaven/hell to accompany you.

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